Leave the sheep behind

When you find yourself in this place it can be hard to get out. In fact it can seem impossible, improbable and a cruel joke to think that you can ever be like everyone else. Smiling, laughing, full of purpose. Belonging. Enjoying life instead of hating it. The truth of the matter is that when you decide you want to kill yourself many of you feel a sense a relief because an end is in sight. This end may seem like the only option, but I am here to tell you that it is not. Of course suicide is an option. We are all comprised of our own free will to do as we please. But you should know that it is not the only option, no matter what you may believe at this time.

You will never be like everybody else, you are unique and different and deep on many levels. You have deep emotions and empathy and are sensitive to the world around you. You feel so much pain and hurt that it defines who you are. Would you really want to trade that in to be like everyone else? Learning how to cope with who you are and embrace it is the first part of the process. It's okay to be you, it's okay to be different and it's okay to feel so much pain. Without it you would be just like everyone else - a mindless sheep doing and feeling what you are told.

The first thing you need to do is to commit to exploring another option other than suicide. You may not believe there is one, you may feel like suicide is the only way out. But if you take a chance on trying something else you will find yourself rise above the rest and climb the ladder to a higher evolution. You just have to make the commitment to leave suicide behind you.

Take out a notebook and start a journal for this plan, this collection of actions designed to eliminate your own suicide delusion. On the first page you should write, "Suicide is not the only option". Write it over and over again. Write it until it reaches your core and you believe in it. This is called a writing meditation. Whenever you feel yourself losing sight of your plan take out your notebook and write it again. Say it to yourself throughout the day when you find your mind wandering towards suicide. Only when you believe there is even the slightest possibility that there is another option besides suicide can you move on.